Is mimicry art or deception?

Belief

What is it that makes two people, with thoughts equal and departing down the same road, deviate so far from each other? There are two possibilities: Either they hold hands tight, and though they pull their bodies away, there will always be the at connection of communication and consistency between them?
Or there is the other possibility: That of no connection--nothing to hold on to. Their paths vary ever so slightly and, when they look back, they see that they never really were on the same path at all.
So why the difference? Why is it that these thoughts of unsurity in my mind force me to reevaluate who I am and what I believe--and I think in the end bring me closer to a truth that I have known for a very long time.
Is my truth someone else's also? Or are there multitudes of truth? Does truth matter?
All the time we hear people speaking of what they know and of what they believe. But what is it to know? How can you know? What if, really, there is only faith? And truth is the elusive element? What is the difference of faith for a believer than a non believer? Are faith and doubt really that far apart? Or do they have that constant hand hold--and each has just been assigned a different name to match their direction?
And what is right? How can I say that what is right for me is right for everyone--even when I know with a firm conviction that it is?
I doubt...but I also have faith. It is the doubting that makes us stronger, and while no one can at all say that if you are unsure that you should hide that and truth will come (rather, you should seek out the root of your doubt, educate yourself and follow where the evidence points) are the two really different? What is truth but truth's own propaganda?
Faith. Believing in something which is not seen which is TRUE. Truth. What is truth? And how can you prove it? Maybe the truth is that you can't.

To My Readers, though you be few:
It is often said in literature that love conquers all--love is the eternal purpose of life--love is what makes a person's soul sing. But some decisions must put aside love, must scorn it and detach from it--disentangle completely. Some decisions are wholly for the good of the individual, for self, for future.
A quote in church the other week read, "Sometimes in order to have hope for a happier future, we have to give up hope of having a happier past." And so that is what I am doing.
The hardest thing for me in life is to leave the things I love behind. The feeling of abandoning love goes against everything that I believe in every corner of my heart.
But I KNOW that it is right.
How can something that is right hurt so much?
I want that happy future. I want to put aside everything that I think I'm entitled to, everything that has hurt me, everything that I have dreamed of--and start fresh. I want to go into my life with no expectations but happiness...and I want to achieve that happiness...I will achieve that happiness. But it takes time.
Dear Reader, I'll miss you. This is a turning point. I'm turning my back on that past and looking to the new with no expectations. No preconceived notion of how I want things to turn out.
This is the new. This will be the new format of my life. One day at a time.
All my love and hope for the future,
H.

Questions

• What is it about the lives we live that make us who we are?
• What is perception?
• How do I see things? --Life? --Beauty? --anything?
• Do I see things?
  
• We care. Why is that?
• If you don't care, then what is the point?
• What is my distinction?
• Do we deny things in the world because we are afraid of what we will discover about ourselves?
• Do we keep information from ourselves to uphold an idea or to protect an ideal?
• What conclusion does my evidence allow me to draw?
• Why is it that I believe what I do?
• Where is the common ground?
• What makes us the same?
• Why do we argue for thigns that we don't know?
• How can I claim to know the situation, when I will never be in it?
• How can I pretend to know the world when I have only seen a little corner of it?
• To what dreams will I give up my life?
• What sacrifices will I make for the good?
• What dreams do I have that are only of the moment?
• Where is the inertia taking me?
• Where next will I go?
• How much of what we do can we blame on those in charge, and how much is our personal incentive?
• Why do we seek to continually blame everybody else for our problems when we are the only logical solution for them?
• What can I do?
• Where does "their" part end and mine begin?
• Is there a line or just grey?
• Logic and emotion: Which am I more of today?
• Who can stop another from dreaming when their hearts truly desire it?
• Why?

How can I better
Express myself than
Through my words and my voice?

How can I ever hope
To have a voice in
This world if I am
Unwilling to open my
Mouth and Speak?

And so I open my
Mouth to speak the words
Of my heart, my mind, my being.
I speak the words of truth and reality
To the world

Saving that hope for another day.

Oh, to go back to that dream before the much awaited reality awakens. Oh to live life completely in those moments when clarity blinds itself and you are nothing but blissfully happy and unaware. Such moments happen far too rarely and pass all too quickly, if even they have existed at all.
So little left to hold on to, and yet so much to lose. Do I let it slip out of my fingers, content that the end is come? Or do I hold on--just for one second more...and one second more--in expectation of Hope's salvation? Where is the dream from my past life?
Losing that hope, 'til another day.
Which, Mr. Frost, is the road less traveled? The road that I should take? Which one will lead me home?

Thoughts from a past life...again!

When I lived in Oregon, I worked in the Sporting Goods/Fitness section of Sears...looking back, that was probably the best job I ever had. It was little bit boring...I had a ton of time to just sit and think and write.
Today, I was going through my trunk, looking for something (okay, okay, it was wart remover...) and I came across this piece of paper, written on the back of a Lawn and Garden rebate form. In case anyone was wondering, I wrote this while standing on a Proform A something something treadmill...it cost about $799 and was my favorite spot to stand in the whole department. I could lean against the hand rails and watch everyone in the L&G and Tools departments....good times...even if I didn't know it then.

It is the image that becomes the biggest chore. Overcoming the enigma of life and breaking through to the core of the situation. It's getting to the intuition; the feeling; the heart. I often think that it isn't the situation that matters so much--the who, the what, the when, the where, the why--but the voice that follows it. The name will be reused. The spot recycled--the words twisted and turned in memory's eye. But the feeling will be unique. The feeling that come in the dream was so real--so comforting--so much its own feeling...and yet, it was only a dream. Dreams come and go--intangible--an image which becomes a chore to overcome. Because a dream is not simply a whisper. It's the reality of unique feeling breaking through to life's most deviating, most changing surface--the conscience.

__________

But what of the brave?
What of the lowly of heart?
Dust to dust and
Ashes to ashes--
Their hearts remain.
Enduring through the
Centuries they are more
than just words in stories--
they are the encompassment
of life.

_________

We all have a past--eventually it catches up with us in this game of cat and mouse. In those moments we become our worst enemies are the moments when it is displayed before the world.